Minor Dictionary
of Humorous Quotations

Nationalism | Neighbours | News and Newspapers | New Year | New York | Nostalgia | Nudism and Nudists | Numbers |

Nationalism is a silly cock crowing on its own dunghill. Richard Aldington

A luxury becomes a necessity when the neighbours have it.

Don't covet your neighbour's wife: you may get her.

The Bible tells us to love our neighbours and also love our enemies; probably because they are the same people. G.K. Chesterton

Amazing but true...

• There is so much sand in Northern Africa that if it were spread out it would completely cover the Sahara desert.
• If all the salmon caught in Canada in one year were laid end to end across the Sahara desert, the smell would be absolutely awful.
• Russian tanks steamrollering through New Jersey! Details at eleven!!!
• Today the East German pole-vault champion became the West German pole-vault champion.

New Year's eve is the time of year when a man most feels his age, and his wife most often reminds him to act it. Webster's Unafraid Dictionary

New York

New York is real. The rest is done with mirrors.

Nostalgia is the realization that things were not as unbearable as they seemed at the time.

Even nostalgia is not as good as it used to be.

Definition of a nudist camp - place where nothing goes on. Leo Aikman

If God had wanted you to go around nude, he would have given you bigger hands.

Numeric stability is probably not all that important when you're guessing.

Once upon a time, when I was training to be a mathematician, a group of us bright young students taking number theory discovered the names of the smaller prime number. 2: the odd prime - it's the only even prime, therefore it's odd. QED. 3: the true prime - Lewis Carroll: "What I tell you three times, it is true". 31: the arbitrary prime - determined by unanimous unvote. We needed an arbitrary prime in case the prof asked for one, and so had an election. 91 received the most voted (well, it "looks" prime) and 341 the next most. However, 31 was the only candidate to receive none at all. Since the composite numbers are formed from primes, their qualities are derived from those primes. So, for instance, the number 6 is "odd but true", while the powers of 2 are all extremely odd numbers.